-Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend. Which
means you're rare or that you cheated :P You're
the kind of chick that can hang out with your
boyfriend's friends and be silly. You don't
care about presents or about going to fancy
placed. Hell, just hang out. You're just happy
being around your boyfriend.


What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla


wahahhaha....can't believe it!!!!!!!!!!! i was laughin non-stop when i saw this result!!!!!!....

well... im dead beat!!! i hate my driving instructor!! wanna sack him! hahaha... haiz... but im not that heartless after all... went to united square just now and had lunch with stace, lilian and sher... saw Moses Lim.. he's fat...oops... *mean* had free green tea ice-cream at Genki... Kim is so nice! still as generous! yeah...

Listenin to class 95... hmm..playin the song "Goodbye" ............

Izzit time to say goodbye to u?! i guess is time for me to move on my life without U...dont wish to think of u anymore... dont wish to miss U anymore... im getting tired... it drains me..it hurts me...i dont see any outcome if i continue to behave like that.. *sad*

Time to go off... tml still gotta driving lesson...tuition and of course! my first kickboxing lesson!!! yeah.... excited!!!

sleepy me...

Is 1am.. argh... freaking tired.. had a long day!! i mean really long... shall go sleep..promise to update again tml night.... feel like changing my blog skin again.. although not many pple read it..but just feel like changing it! wahhaha... nitZ

Morning!!

Im sleepy... came online to paste my blog... haha...last night the blogger went crazy...could not post it! haiz.. so sad.....

Goin to iron my clothes now! Hope today will be a better day than yesterday!!!!!

tAtAzzz...

This Blog was written on 27/05/03…

the time now is 10.49pm.. planned to go to bed and catch some sleep but somehow... many things to do... realised that is time to vent my thoughts into my dear blog!

Listening to Tony Rich Project's song "Nobody knows" *Pj started singing*

"I pretended I’m glad you went away
These four walls close in more every day
And I’m dying inside
And nobody knows it but me, mmm mmm

Like a clown I put on a show
The pain is real even if nobody knows
And I’m crying inside
And nobody knows it but me, yeah mmm mmm

Why didn’t I say
The things I needed to say?
How could I let my angel get away?
Now my world is just a-tumbling down
I can say it so clearly
But you’re nowhere around"

felt sad whenever i hear this song... reminded me of my ex-bf.. wonder how is he..... :(

I was online last night... but didnt came to update my blog... lazy.. haiz... let me see what did i do yesterday... damm..realised i wasted one whole day... went to sch for some SC meeting which lasted for 2 hours?! pathetic..then went to driving centre ..argh... hate the instructor! or rather i should hate myself..just cant seem to master the art of driving!! help.... then i went to clementi to eat dinner.. was alone! pathetic but i met my papa! yeah.....listened to his complainted while having my dinner.... poor daddy.... after which i went to give tuition...haiz..lifeless i suppose!!!

Today was yet another lifeless day..... nothing interesting except my driving lesson! ahhahaa... finally out of the stupid circuit!!! IM ON THE ROAD cruising!! excited!! hahaha.
very nice feelin esp when i was at 70km/h..... simply FANTASTIC... then i went to jurong point and alter my levis jeans..haha..the sales guy was a funny young man! i think he's around my age?!?! hahaha.... or maybe older!! just cant stop smiling at himself.. i was laughin non-stop...then he was clumsy! hahaha then i went to Nokia care centre to change my ear piece!! the stock finally came in!!! Waited for 2 months for that stupid ear piece! argh.... the customer service lady..erm her name is Aisha.... hmm...i should call her AISHA THE BLUR QUEEN...haha.. *mean* she's blur like sotong lor... arghh...nearly freak out when she said 'im sorry the stock is not here yet' she didnt even bother to check!!!!!! i want to complain man!! haha...then i told her i called and the man said they hav the stock..then she went to ask her colleague.... Blur right!!!!!!!!!!!!

after tuition at Liting's place, i went home and rest!!! re-energiseD my battery!!! then i Went to give tuition again over at west coast.... saw yen chern!! he slimmed down! haiz.........that ends my day!

oh..i was looking out for lancer cars lately...dunno why..haha.... then this morning i saw this car no. plate 3889! hahaha... immediately sms sher! wahhahaha..... too bad the driver is a lady!

Was talkin to Cai Yun this afternoon.... haiz... time to start my NYAA project...need to plan for expedition..goin puala ubin or batam to feed mosqitoes! argh..need to do research... budget.. write proposal... recruiting pple..advertising... so many... BRAIN CRACKING............

Uh-oh.. listenin to some sad songs now... BU ZHI DE... sher just mentioned bout this song few days ago... hmm.... this song probably expressed her feelings....

hmm.... why didnt u reply my msg last night!!!!!!... wonder what u are doin now... lying on ur bunk bed.???.smsing some pretty ladies?! argh.... my wild thinking running wild again.... shall dedicate the song "Hu rang jue de hao xiang ni" to u...

James didnt msg me...didnt want to msg him as well.... friendship greatly affected!!! haiz... no more Jeep rides from him in future...no more lame jokes from him... no more sweets msgs from him........ why did i end up like that....!!!

'Angel', 'sweetie', 'my ger' is not what i wish to hear if pple dont mean it at all... though it might be heart-warming for a loner like me... i guess it will hurt more.... i dont wish to fall into the hole by the name 'LOVE'!! damm...im crappin rubbish..so much irony in my words.... INCONSISTANCY....... what do i really really want?!?!?!?!!?!!?!!?!?!

eyes just cant stop closin..going back sch for ambassador stuffs tml morning... SHAGGED...... feel like sleepin forever and not wake up... damm.... MADNESS.....

anyone cares?!!?! none i guess.......

time: 2.19am!
Song: I'll never someone like you by BSB...

ARGH...

Im very tired... shagged... listenin to a sad song... made the wrong choice.... should hav listen to some songs which can cheer me up...

hmm... when i saw ur sms, i was pretty happy... somehow just cant stop smiling in the cab... though it was nothing much but hmm...im mad....

Today EN was BUSY...... i sold one huge SAKE bottle.... so proud of myself.... im really mad... is hard to sell SAKE to locals k... Japanese knows how to drink those SAKE... i hate it... finished work at 12..had a little party... so much food.... all of them were drinking beer... wanted to drink beer but in the end i sticked to my mango juice and calpis.... realised that if i touched beer..i might end up being a drunkard.... i will probably drown all my sorrows in the beer..... dont wish to see that ever happen........

Tml gotta driving lesson! yeah..finally can start my intensive driving lessons from tomorrow on... yeah...excited... hopefully nothing goes wrong! hmm...at night still gotta tuition.... argh.. died...

time to enter my dreamland... gotta wake up early in the morning to go sch... got 1001 reasons to not go but..... no choice.. thinkin of you which im not supposed to.. :( wonder where is that stupid police man! think he busy catch thiefs until dunno how to send sms... argh!!!!!! dear blog!!!!!

Eileen is really in love this time round! good for her! hopefully she wont avoid him! i will pity that kid... as for sher... haiz... somehow 2889 just appeared somehow... no wish to mention him..just love to mention his car! :p hohohohoho......... where is my choco biscuits!!! HMPH..

Happy birthday clubbing bf!! Miss ya lotsa!

haha... before i log offline to watch tV.... went to read eileen's blog....

Seems like she's havin problems.. fallin in love with someone she's not suppose to?!?!? haiyar..i dont believe in that.... u can fall in love with anyone!!! as long as u hav that chemistry and feelin!!!! be brave bout ur feelings pal... dont hide... admit it... if this is gonna hurt the friendship and he's gonna avoid u then he's a BASTARD.... oops..im too harsh...

I hate guys who are like that.... what generation is this!!! Only think that by avoiding the girl then everything gonna be fine... damm... what is this!! *%^@(^%&

Guys out there..if u dont like then say dont like... but pls maintain the friendship... it will only hurt the girl more if u avoid or shun her away... treat it as nothing happen can?!!? although it might leave a scar but at least the scar will not become BIGGER..... i detest guys who are like that.... a bunch of fools... be more open bout it can?!

Oh..wonder why i hav such a big reaction..... cos i suddenly thought of a person..... HE'S LIKE THAT.................... argh!!!

tata...

Time: 1.20pm..
Song:Just can't get enough by depeche mode...

Hmm... nice song..just downloaded... just cant get enough of who??!??!.. whahaha... maybe money....*bAsh* im a money faced woman!!!!!!!!!!

Im mad again..lack of sleep i suppose?!?! well, only manage to catch some sleep after tossing around for 45 minutes!!!!! I was thinking bout u? i dunno... nah.. i read a book just last week.... a chinese one.... took me 2 days to complete... the story was typical but yet i like it... the story was like this...

A guy and a girl... the guy's name is Yan...the girl's name is erm... Ting... Yan is a smart guy...but very rebellious... his best friend fall in love with Ting... he likes Ting but gave up eventually... after which, they went to uni... lost contact... Yan found the his love... but she died... Ting and Yan met again via internet somehow... got together... this is the super short version.... the entire story veri interesting..alot of mixed feelings for me after i finished this book.......

Later goin to give tuition... i guess i want to give up this kid... his mum called yesterday..sort of told her my intention to quit..im not irresponsible... but somehow... i cant stand his attitude!! Time to start looking for another tuition lobang..or maybe i should just stick to one tuition and my work at EN... that leaves me with more time to disturb pple... or rather... search for LOVE...... nah... im not desperate.... dont wish to be desperate for love... love will drives me crazy i suppose....

Tml gonna be a hectic day... hate it... chaotic life....

Time: 3.15am
Song: Never gonna give you up...

Well, guess u are still in the bus on ur way home..wonder if u did enjoy urself... was glad that u kept ur promise... wanted to call u suddenly... missed ur voice.. in fact i missed everything bout u...but realised i didnt hav the courage to do it...didnt hav the courage to dial ur no. Someone else is replacing u in my mind.. damm... im scared.. frightened... fear! I hope i will never gonna give u up but i guess somehow i will... if u still remain like that... will u know?!

Today was a HECTIC day... and i mean REALLLY HECTIC... first i woke up early in the morning to give tuition at west coast.. came home and rest for less than an hour then i went for another tuition at Jurong point... After which, i went to sher's hse and waited at her house downstairs for a mere 45 minutes... that 45 minutes was disaster! The SUN is trying to be funny! So freaking hot! wonder what happen to MR SUn.... sat at the stairs and looked like an idiot..then went to count the no. of lancer cars on the road at a point of time! damm..i was really bored lor! And guess what.. i saw Tan ah pek's car zoom passed me.... was i lucky?! i didnt see once... but TWICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! in less than 15 minutes... hmm..... my instinct tells me that i die die oso want to drive a lancer next time!!!!!!

After waiting for so long... sher and her dad finally came down..with Pepsi Twist... was cooling! HEAVEn... haha.... sher's dad can speed sia! nearly freak out! he drove us to novena! Felt good after the church service! We proceeded to town.. taka... to find gAry... is his birthday!!... and guess wat..i bought a levis jeans... spent $$$ again..haiz.. my hard earned money!!! but well, it was worth it... love it..... hee... saw gary... still as cute! Passed him the gift and we rushed to Pasir Ris... my ex-dear's birthday... the bungalow chalet was GIGANTIC....big!!! got 4 rms... so comfortable! and got a huge kitchen, a spacious living room and a vast area for bbq.. can park at least 3 lancer cars.. but the bad point is that that place is ULU...very ulu... some elias road...

I think my ex-dear put on weight..but still so cheeky... and talkative! talk non-stop... hahaha.... interesting guy.... fatherly look.... everything about him just seem so good.... stayed for a while...ate a few hot dogs, 2 sticks of satay and we are off to MS cartel to hav a proper meal! haha... had the chicken POP salad again! .... and free 2 bowls of mushroom soups... Desmond really spoiled me... hahaha.... one day must really thank him properly! After our dinner, we went mw2.. hahaha.... before that sher went to the toilet over at dbl 0 there for 15 minutes!!! argh... im sick and tired of waiting for her today!!! test my patient limit to the MAX.......... as we walked to mw2... i spotted tah ah pek's car again!!!!!!!!!!

ARGH... 3 times in a row i saw the car no. plate 2889.... why why tell me why!!!! Why i get to see tan ah pek's car... suay..hahahahaha... no la.... wanted to throw rotten eggs man! haha..but is against the law!!!! oOoooo...........

MW2 was cool...met some ngee ann guy... tommy and chen en were funny..esp the way they danced.... Drunkards..... my clubbing bf smsed me... put us aeroplane..lucky he still got the heart to msg me! if not next time i will strangle him when i see him!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thought i might be lucky enuff to bump into u somehow..but fate or rather lady luck is not with me....

I watched mAtrix reloaded! love the effects! Kenneth was a nice guy.. but somehow no chemistry... why?! i think maybe cos my mind got someone...!! argh... uh-oh..... not a good sign...i didnt even hav the chance to go out with u. damm......... hopefully someone will take over ur place soon.. someone saves me from misery?! any kind soul?!!?!

sleepy...was smsing andy since last night and up till this very moment!!! argh.... im jealous over something.... that feeling must be sour!!!! not other flavours! argh..what's wrong with me... im confused... wan an my dear blog!!!

Time: 12.30pm

Damm...KS playing funny songs..im still listening to it.... watever...

Going to call up my student and change the tuition to tml...then i can go pasir ris and attend my ex-dear's birthday... and get to meet kenneth tonight.... hmm....my student will be very happy..she will have more time to complete her work!

Hungry! Tsk tsk.....house left with a bottle of milo and maggie mee!??!?! ARGH....... pek cek!!!!!!! lazy to go out and buy a packet of pathetic rice....

Still no sms from u.......... argh... this time really give up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i hate u..dont let me see u when i go down mw2.... my heart will melt when i see u...

is my hp spoilt?! hate to send for servicing! all my msgs will be gone...or should i say all ur msgs will be gone...... once is gone it can never get back.......

gtg..suppose to pack my room..but argh....... im lazy....... shall have milo buffet?!!?! yupZ.......

time: 1.54 am
Song: What the world needs now (can try out this website! nice! http://arose4ever.com/roses/world_needs_now.htm )

*pJ starts singing*

What the world needs now is love, sweet love
It's the only thing that there's just too little of
What the world needs now is love, sweet love,
No not just for some but for everyone

damm.... tears just flow down while listening to this song... what i need now is ur sms... but u are just so heartless... not even a sms from you.. well, shouldnt hav expect so much...shouldnt demand so much... i will always bear in mind that WE ARE FRIENDS...maybe in ur mind im just a stranger who happened to have ur hp no..... why am i so crazy over you...

Went to give tuition just now.. Kai Xun is really hopeless... i really want to give up.... can't take it anymore... things just can't seem to register in his mind..what's the point to hav tuitions?! waste his mum's money... i don't wish to earn such money.... i want satisfaction... money is not my concern (im lying).... how can i help him?!! who is going to help me?!

Went to meet hK, jAc and eileen at anchor point... it was a big shock! anchor point was QUIET...so many shops closed down... even the food court...then we went to queensway mac donald to eat... hopefully hk and jac dont mind the small presents... lent eileen my camera..don't dare to tell my mum..i think she will scold me upside down... then she will complain to my dad...argh..dont wish to think about it.. better get back from eileen soon before my mum asked..... argh.... Hopefully eileen will take good care of it... is precious! quite worried..she's going to take photos on a sports day..imagine..the crowd will be chaotic! will my precious camera in safe hands?!
i wonder..... but well, already lent it to her..no point saying anything now....

Went to jac's place and watch tV..ate her birthday cake... watched tV... smsing.... argh... james the jeep guy called... asked me go out for dinner.. was tempted..didnt want to go home too early... scared to see mum.. i'm scared that she asked bout the camera! In the end i rejected his offer... im afraid his pesistance will eventually touched my heart... im shagged.... left jac's hse at 10 plus... american idol 2 finale..argh... wanted to rush home in cab but well, im afraid that mum is still awake... took bus... walked to the bustop with hk.... talked to her bout my screwed up life... felt good after that... and i chased after my bus 51...

Finally reached home at 10.50pm.... mUm was not in the living room! i was safe! she's in her lala land..... switched on my tV and watched american idol.. so glad that Ruben won!! my teddy bear....

Eileen wanted to receive flowers on her birthday... i want too....not on my birthday.. somehow someday someone just gives me flowers... i must be dreaming.... never gonna have such luck... man always think that buying flowers are a waste of money... i think so too..but somehow...it is just so special... kenneth had a correct guess what is my favourite flower..and color... damm...he can read my mind...... scary.....

Tml gonna give tuition again... this time is Liting..hopefully she will remember to do her hw... Jia Jun's birthday bash is tml.... made a mistake! argh!!!! how am i suppose to rush down?! finished my tuition at 4.30... intend to meet eileen to take the camera but.... help! suppose to meet Kenneth in the evening... how am i going to go for ex-dear's bash....... hmm... tml wake up then plan again.... too vexed to think now..

No msg from you tonight...not pinning hopes tomorrow as well..... dont wish to have some hope and left hopeless!!!

Ex-dear, happy birthday..... (though is bit early...but still...)

Time: 1.37pm

Listening to wKrZ 91.3.. KS is simply so funny... wonderful DJ...

Went back sch yesterday for the SC meeting..simply bored... but i spotted a guy who look like jiajun..got dimples! haha..XH oso said that he's not bad... CUTE... after meeting, head down to holland village for lunch..went to eat kFC buddy's meal.. so full.... Lina went Sushi Teh for interview.. but i guess chances are slim..so many pple... oh i went body shop and bought shower gel..haha..so nice! strawberry and another one..erm..dunno what izzit..but i left it at EN..argh... me and my blur mind...

Selene came last night..she and her gf.. and bryan going to dbl O... haiz... in the end didnt manage to get it... damm..i must wait for another 4 years in order to get it..but the person in charge KIKI was gorgoeous! HOT... ha...

Going to give tuition later..then goin down anchor point meet up my buddies... gonna become santa claus.. so many presents to give away... had a big BURNT in my pocket as well....

Oh.... playing my current favourite song...by simply red... SUNRISE....argh...hope to see sunrise soon... forgot how it looked like... i guessed i had been neglecting life for a long long time...time for me to explore soon.... what kinda of life am i living at this point of time?! gUys?! wORk? tuition?! argh......

Once, I told myself i wont take the initiative to msg u.. not that often but somehow my itchy short fingers just scroll down the hp and sent it to u.. i hate myself... hoping that u will reply somehow... why am i always hoping... am i really falling in love with you.. NOPE..... im sure of that answer... just that somehow u drives me crazy... and yesh... im going to have a mental breakdown soon...

Today is ellyas's birthday...argh... gonna buy present for him.... Jia Jun's party this sat... called me last night..missed his voice.... miss him... :p

Wondering if im still watching movie tml night... haiz...maybe he will put me aeroplane... who knows?! not even a single SMS from him.... well, maybe i can really have a break and stay at home and packed my stuffs.... mEssy messy messy...........

hUngry.. maggie mee.. here i come!!!!! hao xiang ni...

time: 1.42pm

Damm...im feeling depressed... feeling down... going to give tuition soon.... will only be back home at night maybe 10pm? argh...

Chatting with amanda... she found work! at some ulu factory.. good for her though... but somehow the pay is miserable... economy bad

heLp....... im sleepy... im lazy... im going crazy!!!!!!!! sher called..listened till i feel like boxing that man... dunno how to treasure my best friend! haiz... dunno what's going on.... hmmm.... i think the song 'Don't you want me' sounds perfect at this moment!

Should i go liquid room tml with hiro and jason?! Guess i msg cavell later..see if she wants to go too.. Hiro going to work at another place... wont get to see him much in future... :(

Time to go off now....... hate to leave house in the afternoon... the weather is killing me!!

time:11.28am
MooD: feeling bad...
Song: Hear me cry by Cagnet...

I didnt mean to hurt u.. im really sorry... is my loss not to accept u... i will definitely regret in future... u have everything i want in a guy... but somehow i dont know why i dont wish to give it a try... appreciate everything you did for me... all i could do is to give u a peck on the cheek and the word sorry... i dont know how much i hurt u... hopefully not much... u said i looked like ur first gf... in fact she's the one u love most... i felt pain... it makes me think that im her shadow... do u really think u are just like any other guy in my life?! if i gave u that feeling that forget it...hope u get a girl who really appreciates u...

argh..i blew everything up.... screwed up everything..thought i was searching for love... when love appeared i blew it away... what do i want?! He came all the way down to pick me up from work... didnt wear his favourite cap cos i dont like it... hmmm.... i simply blew it away.. everything's gone...

Yesterday was memory.. what a word to use.. well, EN was pretty quiet... Jason was working.. he was admiring one of the customers... RUth... pretty elegant lady.... Colin looked so tired... Elgin was as usual, girlish... and me? floating around... Hiro went waveboarding... face RED.... cool... a customer cried... i think Hiro made her cry! Maybe she confessed her love for hiro then he rejected her.......

When i reached home, it was already 1am... haiz... tears somehow just flow down.. for a while though.. didnt know who to turn to..wanted to type to my dear blog but it was out of order... lucky my bro^big was online..and my iCq paL J was there... felt better after chatting with them.... then was smsing Andy until i fallen asleep... haiz.... poor dude... he was studying for his exam... asked him go study and he dont want.. argh.... qi si wo le...

Hope to hear from shereen soon...she called me just now in sch! wahaha... heard what happened last night but not much.. haiz.. dunno how.... i bet she will scold me upside down why let this chance slipped away... well. i might never ever get to know such a guy anymore... then i think can really be a NUN....... spinister..... loner

J just msged this:

when u are fishing,
once u feel the fish is on hook
u should pull the rope in...
but not all the way... the fish struggles... if u kept pulling
either the rope, it will break or the fish might struggle and got away
there should be moment of pull and short moment of relax but not release
then slowly ur fish will be caught

hmmm...wondering what he's trying to imply...asked him then he said im a clever girl...all self explanatory..argh.....my mind is brain-dead!!!! cant think probably anymore!

Going to give tuitions later... another day gone! didnt do anything meaningful again... wasted.... intend to go Jurong Point get some presents....

I think i shall end her... really too vexed to continue... help... need someone to teach me how to live life to the fullest without much regrets!

time: 12.01pm
Song: May i love you by Zhang Zhi Cheng, Deng ni kan kou ba wo liu xia lai by Wang Jie

Hmm..... meaningful song... want to sing to that someone.. but guess i will never ever get the chance....

Woke up at 9.30! haiz..intend to sleep till 12... but... my student's grandma called... hmm.. no choice..couldnt get back to my dreamland.... argh...mum just called...got disconnected from net.... haiz....

Came online since i couldnt get back to sleep and the TV is occupied by that CHINA WOMAN.... really hate her...... did something to my blog... dunno if it will work... *praying hard*

Yesterday was fun cum tiring day.... headed back to malaysia in the wee hours..... ate my favourite roti prata immediately i landed.. nothing changed.. grandma was so happy to see me... kept sayang me k... gave her 50 bucks for her birthday cos mum said dont buy anything... hmm... heard a shocking news... sister is pregnant... hmm.... happy for her... quite alot pple attended the brithdae party... well, saw all my cousins... hmm... mei fang graduated... but didnt go look for job....too ambitious... wanna earn big bucks... haiz...my mum very heart broken with my second uncle...im also very disappointed this time round when i went back.... i saw my 'ber-yi' hahaa...my favourite auntie..she became so thin... haiz... felt very sad when i saw her in such a state... i think my second uncle's family is useless! Why cant they go earn money themselves... why must they depend on my ber-yi... she's already 47... she's single... why must she support ur family! Sometimes i really hope my ber-yi should stay in SG and never go back there...

I really hope to get my car licence soon... then can drive back malaysia often to visit my grandma and my ber-yi.... but, where is the car?!

Reached SG at about 6pm.. Third uncle's driving speed was good... fast.... .Reached home unpacked some stuffs then head down town meet shereen for dinner... my yuki yaki... hahaha....i was tired... but still want to go out.. Sadly, didnt manage to eat the green tea ice-cream! haiz... the boss was quite nice..she said next time can go look for her and only order ice-cream instead of eating the steamboat..hahaha.... so nice..oh her name is Amy..must remember...we were the last to leave the restaurant! so paiseh.... actually terence was there as well...haiz... felt extra though... should have asked sher to go try out with him instead... damm..im stupid... tommy msged me to take care of shereen...

so many pple asked me take care of other pple... then who take care of me!? argh...

Took bus down town... not many pple... the driver was singing..hahaha It was a long bus journey ... was stoneing inside the bus... recalling some pple... suddenly thought of Gary... ended up in Taka square.. why? went there to take a peek at him... haha..he was workin... his smile was erm... nice?! haha... those very boyish smile... hmm.... went to say hi and ran to cine to meet sher..was LATE! haha Gary's birthday coming... Jia JUn's birthday oso coming... already know what to get for them... hmm.. gonna make something nice since im so free... James The jeep guy smsed me...asked me if i miss him...dunno what to reply...he said he wants to find a soul mate for his car.. what's the meaning?! i dont get it... i can be his friend..in fact his good friend... but not a BGR relationship.... Kenneth the TAS guy oso qi so wo le... how... hope to hear Andy's voice at that point of time but nah..phone didnt ring....... walked alone to the bustop with great despair.....

haiz..hp ringing now.. let me see...... hmm the caller was james the jeep guy... haiz.. ..he wanted to send me to work later...argh........ rejected him again.. what's wrong with me... but well, he's going to send me home tonight after work... actually i can take cab home... can claim the $$ anyway...but cant bear to say no to him again... want to maintain this friendship.. oh dear..hp ringing again.. is selene... she wants to find work together with me..but my time is packed this week... with tuition, working at EN... next week onwards gonna start my intensive driving lessons... argh..help... moreover im going to sign uo my kickboxing lessons this weekend... what should i do...

Planning to go out with hk and the rest this thurs.. im a blur queen... still tell the kenneth can meet him up on thurs... argh... maybe i should not meet anyone and just hide at home and rest..... wahhahaha........ madness.... shall not crack my brain..is killing my cells!!!!!!!! shall see how when the day comes...

Im tired.... wore out... want to go out with classmates, my gang of friends.... want to go changi beach and look at aeroplanes... want to go clubbing, want to watch movie, want to drive, want to CRY.....................

going to do some soul searching now by reading straits times... haha.. *maDness*

Time: 1.05am!
Song: Close to you by the carpenters, Bu neng cheng shou de tong ku by sammi cheng

Hmm..tiring... in another 5 hours time, im heading to malaysia.... back to my mum's hometown.... grandma's 80th birthday...packed nothing actually..didnt know what to pack inside my levis bag... not as if im staying overnight..im coming back in the evening! hmm.... intend to meet up sher to go eat Yuki Yaki...a new restaurant in Cine... wanna try it..

last night was disaster at EN again... working with that transexual simply makes me vomit blood... haiz... but well, time flies really fast last night though... maybe cos jason and colin were working... Elgin went back at 9pm...he was so pale..poor guy... then my favourite customer Mr Ito came to dine with his client...he looked so decent..
Ate supper after work at EN..had mushroom porriage... so yummy..then had desert... wow..so full.... head home in meces cab at last i get a meces cab!!!!!!... was practically smsing Andy the entire night... not that im very interested in him but somehow just cant stop smsing himm.... I LOVE SMSING.... hahahaha..... then he called me up and we chatted a while.. interesting... oh then jason invited me and hiro to go liquid room drink next wednesday... should i go?! hmm...Hiro getting cuter!

Is hwee keng's birthday but no chance to celebrate with her... Am i too busy?! well, read eileen's blog just now... they met up and celebrate though..without me.. well, wonder why no one ask me.. feel really sad and hurt..but whatever it is... still wish her happy birthday... will pass her the present soon i hope... somehow i wished i never went to read eileen's blog...i regretted.....if i never read, i wont know, when i dont know, i wont feel sad... am i right?! *MAD*

well, today no work...but had tuition with Liting at 2pm...hmm..... woke up pretty early... helped mum to fill in the form so that she can go malaysia with my sister today... haiz..then hear her complain bout my tenant..the CHINA WOMAN... she's using our air-con!!! argh...no wonder our electicity bills shot up last month! when my mum asked her, she still deny! HATE pple who lie!!!!!!!!!! actually wanted to meet up with yeelian for a while but well, never....

Tuition was dragging.... was quite angry with her... haiz... gotta tell myself to be patient! Wanted to visit the dentist after the tuition but all closed... time to polish my teeth! haiz..next tuesday then go ba... hmm... went to watson and shop for many stuffs... argh..personal stuffs to be precise... hahaha...then head home to change and went raffles place to meet Kenneth, the clever thick-skinned NUS guy... hahahahaha.... had a night full of surprises... really appreciate what he planned.... We went to have satay, stingray and oyster egg..yum yum... then talked about life... as we were happy chatting, i saw Jason the citibank manager! ARGH.... but never see Ken... quite disappointed! hmm.... he came over and we chatted a while! hmm... he said someday next week can go out with Ken..wahahha... *dreaming* i doubt i will go... so paiseh...
after dinner, walked alone the street with kenneth... hmm..didnt know he drives too.... he walked towards a car and stop... search for his car key and said that he found this car key..wondering if it can open this car! whahaha..full of rubbish... head down to mount faber! haiz... reminded me of James... he brought me to mount faber the other time too... hmm... so many cars over there... Kenneth is the most careful driver so far that i know..of course James's jeep oso very nice...hahahaha....both oso very stable... he gave me another surprise..he actually reserved a table and we sat there and chat... feeling and ambience was fanastic... a night full of surprises... he sent me home before 12...haha... decent guy... might be meeting him for movie next friday... hopefully.... i called him uncle agony..haha... feel very comfortable with him... perhaps he's mature..

Chatted with shereen just now..seems like shez very troubled over some guy... haiz.... dunno how to consol her oso....

Kenneth the NP TAS guy is a sweet guy! hahaha...makes me feel high up in the air... asked me to go out with him next week but my schedule quite packed...argh.. how how?!
Andy going zouk mambo night next next wednesday..asked me to join him too...argh... want to see him! but, who should i go with?! maybe should not go afterall...

Alot of thinkings running thru my mind... what am i chasing?! I want to tell u that im really keen to know u better but u simply dont give me a chance... but, i just dont have the courage tell you..i dont wish to have hope and ended hopeless in the end.... i tried means and ways to want to know u better but i failed! Failed badly that i finally decide to give up... i got no intention to send u sms first and hoping u will sms me back..no more waiting..... will be glad if u sms me whenever u feel happy...i might even forward u back..but right now... no more sms from me! im sick and tired........ i want to move on with my life...

time to catch some sleep.... still thinking our first time encounter.......... argh... *cRy*

Time: 12.50pm
Song of the day: Bizarre Love Triangle, Love in the first degree...

*yAwNz* still sleepy... haiz... saw my mama just now... she said she's going back malaysia tml afternoon..argh..im going back on sunday morning with who? i think my aunt..or maybe alone... grandma's 80th birthday..better go back and wish her...didnt visit her for at least a year?! unfillial grandaughter! *bAsh myselF* how i wish i can stay there for a month...but, haiz impossible.....

hmm...chatting with wendy now..long time didnt contact her..so guilty... what am i doing?! haiz..

Wednesday night was so so erm fun? haha...cant find any word to describe... worked at EN till 11pm... was damm pissed at work...that transexual scolded me! :< damm it.. I HATE "HER"....... so angry that even hirose apologised on her behalf... what the hell... i simply dislike her! im not picking on her cos shez a transexual... but..her working attitude sucks... hirose also said so..in fact all of them said so... argh...anyway, lucky Cavell was working...things didnt turn out so bad afterall... but then i missed out the chance to see her 'kor'.. haiz... nvm..another time....

Ended work at 11.. carl and shereen were already outside En waiting for me... ZouK time!!! yeah...but so many pple..haiz... selene, y2m, aiyi, hen and amy were there...all of them so chio..... haiz...im sad lor..cos im the odd one... but well, managed to cut queue and squeeze in.... lucky... playing all the retro retro song... MAMBO night... so fun... but sel didnt really like those music...dunno why... and they care so much the way the dance...come on... i mean i want to go to enjoy myself...not to hear u saying how to dance.... hate that feeling... who cares how u dance... just wanna have fun..unless u want to hook guys or flirt around then hmm......

Well, saw some NP guys... recognize one of them..he's frm TAS... but i forgot his name... his friend drunk..want to fight..so scary... haha..i think i gave him a big heart attack.. i asked if he's frm TAS and ngee ann..wahahhaa.. *mean* i think he was shocked la... but well, after that i continue my crazy dancing... simply indulge with the songs... he gave me heart attack too... he asked my name..and gave me his hp..for what?! of course get the no.. whahaha..and he's so funny... the hp was switched off.. i had to on it... i guess he was drunk... one of his friends kept apologising cos his drunkard friend kept shouting..!!!!!! and that guy definitely from ngee ann too..whahaha... oh by the way that TAS guy's name is Kenneth...another Kenneth..argh.... hahaha... so funny... i forgot to ask his hp no... by the time i remembered he already left... wasnt hoping he will drop me a sms..cos i think he was drunk..but well, he DID...whahaha.... called me a "CUTIE" nearly fainted on the spot..... i think im interested with his tall tall friend who kept apologising...so cute!!!!! hahaha.... *maDness*

Then, there was another bunch of guys who were dancing next to us.. one of them wanted to know y2m.... his name is trevis... from air force..reminded me of mingwei!!!! hahaha... trevis's gang got alot this short short white guy..HE IS MAD....dance like some mad monk... hahaha..... but quite cute... and got another one who reminded me of CLEMENT..... his looks, dance and almost everything reminded me of clement... hahaha..and i know his name! Andy..wahahaha...was happy enough when we shaked hands... but got another heart attack... he passed me his hp as well.. whahahaa..thought he wanted to gave me his 8250... in the end i gave my no. away for the second time! hmm...was damm lucky.... sel and the rest said he's not handsome or what...but just find him charming! hahaha... got chemistry?! hahaha... oh... i think my name is simply too common..he had another girl's no. by the name of michelle as well... he replaced my no. with hers...argh.. so scared that one day some other girl replaced my no. as well... but well, he smoked...clement dont...... hmm...why am i comparing the both of them...

My social circle enlarged again! wahahahahaha.......... didnt regret going Zouk after all.... was planning to leave and head down to Newsroom Bar since tan ah pek was there..and Kenneth the NUS clever thick skinned guy was there too..... hmmm.... stayed in zouk in the end........ jasOn lied...he didnt go down..cos he was too tired! tonight shall scold him upside down.. hahahahahaha........

Yesterday was so so shagged.... bearly had 5 hours of sleep after clubbing at zouk..woke up pretty early to give tuition to my 2 students.... had lunch alone at Long jOHN... then head down to work at En....... James came... he looked cute without his cap.... suddenly felt a little regret in my heart... why did i not think about it before i told him anything..but what thing... maybe i should have said we can continue to know each other before going any further..well, everything is over..i blew it...watever i said cant help. he wont know....

Wonder why i never think before i say anything..haiz... Chie san came back from her hols..she said she bought me cookies..so touched... last night had supper at cartel.. had my favourite mushroom soup...and 1 piece of free onion ring... hahaha...Desmond is crappy..full of nonsense! Mas got his bike licence... yeah..got free ride soon... he said he will give me the free ride once he gets his bike..hee hee..yeah....

hmm...need to go off soon..... time not enough... need to rush give tuition... then need to go work at EN... tonight working till 1am! haiz... but nvm..weekend off! yeah..... wonder if im meeting kenneth the nuS guy tml.... he wanted to watch the matrix... hmm..i want to watch oso.... wait for his sms ba..dont wish to bother him.. going to eat watermelon...yum yum then need to wrap presents! haiz...

dear dear blog... i screwed up my life somehow!!!!

oh..just checked my phone..... that very special guy msged me a plain good nitz.. just 2 words... oh! argh! is enough..im contented!!! IN FACT, im very contented...

im glad to know u... at least u did care somehow... though im sure nothing gonna work out between us.... really glad to know you........ thanks...

time: 12.40am!
song: beautiful girl by joes mari chan

Simply in love with this song...was in the mecedes cab when i heard this song just now... so romantic.. so many memories.... argh..

I got so much stuffs to record in my blog.... for the past 48 hours, so many things happen!! argh... i want to keep these memories..arrghh...but im very shagged now..... promised to update every single detail tml when i have enough sleep....

nightZzZ to myself..... suddenly thought of calling someone and wish him/her good nitz. I MUST BE MAD......... better go sleep.....

time: 9.15am!
Song: i heard a rumour by Bananarma, Together in electirc dreams BY Giogio something

morning dear blog...woke up pretty early..... not feeling well... i think got food poisoning.... argh... last night reached home at 1am sharp! haiz..never work also reached home so late..mama oso never call or ask... my clubbing bf said my mama probably gave up hope on me.....WHICH IS NOT TRUE....... ate tonnes of junks last night... let me recall...

I went to sleep at 3.30pm yesterday..set my alarm clock at 4.15 then wanted to go give tuition.... but i called my student... HE WAS NOT BACK YET....then the grandma said cancel the tuition..so i gladly agreed! wahahaha..... smsed my clubbing bf immediately then he said he come picked me up earlier! hahaha.... so i ate Kit Kat in his car... then i ate sweets...then we went to pick up carl... pretty lady! i think she becomes prettier! .. felt stress with her! hahaha.... we went Cine for movie... Bringing down the house! funny movie..laughed thru out the show..simply a comedy! Bought french fries (my favourite), onion rings... then nachos... ahahha..... happyily munching in the cinema... but then mid way thru the movie pple started calling! ARGH..should have off my hp...but well, it was my SC..gotta go back sch next wed...then my bro^big called me too! hahaha..miss him!

After movie we went changi village! (my latest favourite place) cos i can see erm pretty 'GIRLS'..wahahahahha.... my clubbing bf was complaining! the petrol station was closed! he said everytime with carlin, all the shops closed..wahhaha...cant stop laughing...then i ate nasi lemak..drank ice milo! oh dear.... look at how much junk i ate yesterday! Saw 2 tables of commandoes at the hawker centre...i was trying to spot whether if is clement and gang..but haiz..nah..not them....those guys are SKINNY...very skinny!!!!!!!!!!!!! oh...smsed clement good nitz..then he sent me forwarded msg, the same one he sent 2 nights ago! *peNgZ* told him im at changi then he recommended some food thru SMS as well... argh! simply hate smsing when im searching for food.... did a lame thing...i called him and asked! wahahahahaha..his voice erm... totally the same just like the way he talked! i bet he had a heart attack after the call......... sorry pal...didnt mean to scare U! hahahaha

Oh...after my supper, sent carl to her bf's hse which is at SEmbawang! so far..... couldnt find the place...my clubbing bf lost his cool again! he was yelling in car! just as they were searching for the place.... i had heart attack as well, from a SMS.... and the sender is that Jeep man, mr james chua!!!!! argh.... i think im a mean woman! he smsed said he likes me..and put a how with a question mark..... 'i like you, how?' ARGH.........wat am i suppose to say?! i replied and said thank you... hahaha...... shit... i didnt know what to say! what am i doing....

I thought i was looking for a bf...he got what i want.... A jeep, a successful career, mature, got the looks, can think probably! BUT, i simply blew it off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! damm it....
no wait..the story continued with him saying 'okok, good night' so i replied saying okay and see you soon at EN.... the next moment he called!!!!!!! ...help!!!!!!
he asked if is possible..i simply replied...i think you go look for other girls... argh...i hope i didnt hurt him too hard....i doubt i got so much capabilities to hurt a guy anyway..
told my clubbing bf in the car.... i was asking for his help man...he said why dont i just TRY.... and then the stupid class95 had this song dunno sang by who..singing some 'try' thingy..then my clubbing bf started singing! argh..nearly went bonkers in his car!!!!!!!! The expressway was totally quiet! he just zoom in his lancer... wahahaha....
but well, james coming EN tonight..i wonder how am i going face him...what should i say!? pretend nothing happen?! help.....

Oh listening to the Carpenters song, Close to you... so soothing! reminded me of Jason, my beloved colleague! Received a sms from his just now... FINALLY.... we exchanged no on monday..but i didnt get his no...i wrote the no. on the coaster... then gave it to the 3 dudes..wasnt expecting they will actually smsed me... since we are only colleagues! NOT EVEN FRIENDS.... but still glad that he did sms..hahaha..but in such weird hours! MORNING!!! hahaha.... he's goin Zouk...yeah..asked me to meet him there! yeah... dun even know sher still wants to go not...seems like shez hoping to see some pple tonight...but nah..i just want to have fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! enough of those relationships!

IM SIMPLY NOT READY FOR RELATIONSHIPS............ argh..i finally admit it.... i prefer to know the person in depth first before getting into relationships! i dont want to get hurt..and i dont wish to hurt pple either...... hmm...but is nice to hear pple likes you..wahahaha..the feeling is erm *Honoured* hmm...i dunno izzit the same feeling for other girls... im not a pretty lady..is rare for a guy to like me.... hmm...but i think i will continue to chase after what i want.... chase after my dream! that's what i always tell the others......... hmmm.... oh....going to meet up with ming wei the air force guy soon! excited..feel like hugging him! wahahhahaa...kidding! he's a joker! so am i.... nice friend!
i think im going back to my dreamland now...... tired.... shagged.... life is so beautiful with pple like ...................................... too many names..... dont wish to name out one by one......

Hmm..got a sudden urge to eat army choco biscuits... TAH AH PEK..if u are reading my blog! where is my Kong Guan choco biscuits...hahahahhaha *gRiNz*

time: 1.18pm

wahahha...12 hours ago i was online..12 hours later im online again! i think im seriously MAD

Came online to help my student to find my info on extinct animals..she got some science projects...hmm im such a nice tutor right..hahaha...found DODO bird..and some HEN... dunno what HEn oso..haiz... and e-mailed jia hui too....listening to radio...91.3....KS's voice simply so charming! haiz

Oh...im happy!! in fact very happy... Vinson online..James Phang the vietnam trip guy online..... Jiajun oso online... hahaha...long time didnt chat with Vinson...just realised he broke up with the gf..hmm... not too happy to hear that though i think i should be..since i once liked him.... but is history (i hope is history) Ellyas oso online! felt good chatting with him...good chatter! he's going kallang tml to train..hmm..i want to go see the dragon boat pple!! argh!!! but im working.... *saD*

Later going to meet carl plus my clubbing bf...watching movie! yeah........ downloaded many many song...in fact only 3 la..hahhahaa.... i heard a rumour...then other human league songs...hmmm..........

Papa sold away his business...i wonder what's he going to do....no more duck rice in future...

going to sleep now...... tuition at 4.45pm..argh......going bonkers! someone lend me ur shoulder..hopefully a guy..ha...... *dreaming* Guys more strong la...... not because im flirt k.... hee hee

time: 1.19am!

tired...dead..almost.... just posted something on my webby! hahaha..... going to revamp it man!!! haiZ

En alot customers today.... had fun working with the rest! ahahaha...realised me and jason had similar thinkingS!! hahaha..... he's going ZouK this wed too.... asked if im going...can go with him..wahahahaha..... *hoNouRed*.... feel so bad when i teased him and sang the song 'close to you' to him..argh...

had mango mousse at EN for supper...hahaha free of charge...weird... dunno why Hirose dont want to accept my $$$..... then i took back the HUGE SAKE bottle and Awamori bottle too..so nice k... wonder what i want to put inside... maybe money huh..... if only i have so much money in the first place....

sleepy...... chatting with XH and a couple of IRC pals..hahahahaa..... miss my classmates dearly!

Oh Hiro went for wine tasting today.... dress until so charming! i nearly fall for him! hmmm....... simply love guys who wear formal.... so charming!

think i need to ZzzZzz...... oh Jiahui msged me just now..she said she complained me in her blog..but i didnt read it yet...... shall e-mail her tml.... argh...hope she's not angry.... what's wrong with me.... i just downloaded a song witha strange title: Silly love song...

niTz...tml want to go out! no work! BORED....

oh...one more thing!! Liverpool lost!! hahahaha...... i think they played erm..not so good..disappointed...wonder if Ken is sad not..he supports liverPooL........

time: morning 10am!!!!
moOD: shagged...dead beat.....
song: Ai...by karen MoK

Simply indulge in this song... dunno why.... maybe the lyrics touched my soul...

Last night was a disaster... alot of families came to dine... omg...we were short-handed... and worst..cavell went back at 9pm...leaving alone to deal with the customers.. argh... but well, mooD brightened up at exactly 9.55pm....why?! cos i saw Ken..... !!!! yeah...wish came true...he seem to lost weight....love his smile...charming..... *drooling*

I reached EN at 3.30pm..so went cartel and order my mocha frapp.... lionel didnt want to take my $$$... think he's mad.... i went out..later his supervisor scolded him... *pOOr him*.... i went back and pass him the 5bucks.. so troublesome....

going to work later again.....at 4pm..tonight ladies night..which means alot of lady customers.... argh.... and those working today are GUYS...argh.. eLgin e gay... collin e smoker... and of course jason e toot... hahaha.....then im erm michelle e great... wahhahaha..... SIAO.....

tried to book my driving lessons but no vacancy slot..damm it...i think i forgot everything..my clutch and my gears..my right turn..... hopeless...off to read newspaper! wanna ZzZZzZz...............

time: 12.31pm...

argh..another sunday... tired..last night worked till 12.... by the time i enter my dreamland it was already 2am....woke up so early this moring to give tuition... im shagged.. later still got to work at 4...argh!!!!

Went to Mw2 last night for bearly 15 mintues..why?! hmm..i think im craZy... went there see pple....and feel the atmoshpere..last night quite a big crowd... hmm..oh then saw clement terence and gang... hmm... went there and ask tan ah pek to keep me company for a while..hahaha.... then i went home! and guess what..when i was in cab.. james called..he's at EN...argh.... no fate..who ask him never tell me earlier...i might hang around at EN for while then he can see me...hAiz... then still smsed me at 4am and tell me he's drunk! argh! he called me AUNTIE somemore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!... *fAinted*.....

Sher and stacie and sher's classmates came cartel to eat...cartel Changed already..no longer the cartel i used to like.. BUT im still in love with moCha fRapp....hee hee...

hOls....yeah.... many stuffs awaiting for me to do...oh suddenly realised Dennis is flying to US on Tues for attachement...lucky chap...get to go US yellowstone for 2 months for attachement! I also want to go... going to miss him dearly for sure! THinking back how did i get to know him...hmmm...we went vietnam together..those times in vietnam... argh.... sitting with him the bus and hear him play guitar.... talk about anything under the sun..share our thoughts...hmmm... he's the man! wahahaha.... if he don't have a gf i will seriously go woo him... no joke...wonder if he feel the same way too.... hmm... but nvm... im glad he got such a stable gf... wish him happiness ba... that the least i could do i guess... later shall sms him....

listening to a list of songs that describes my feelings *dreaming*.... haha..first up is David's Tao 'Yue liang dai biao wo de xin....' so nice..so soothing...

I think later must list down the list of stuffs i need to this hols... or maybe i can list on my blog...and some kind soul who happen to be reading might give me some suggestions hor.. wahahaha...... wat do i want to do?!?!!?! erm........

1) Need to go learn kickboxing~!!! no joke!!!!
2) revamp my personal website.... suddenly feel that is so ugly! wahhaha...and oso my dear bloG!
3) revise my japanese!!!!!
4) learn driving!!!! must get licence before Sept!!!!!!!! die die oso want the car licence!!!! heeee
5) meet up with all my friends!!! I MEAN ALL.....everyone on my hp phonebook..wahahaha....... (pple might not want to see me...then how!?!?! )
6) Work harder at EN and hope they wont fire me!!!!!! instead they might want to increase my pay..hee
7) have a healthy diet...no i dont want to slim down...just healthy la..i realised when i want to get slim... the opposite happen!!!!!!!
8) HAVE PLENTY OF SLEEP.........

wahahaha..i think and i hope i can accomplish all these man.... and oso date guys out! ahahhaha....... date in the name of friends...im not hoping for relationships... finally wake up from my dreamland! i think i rather to have many many friends than having a bf... i dont deny i like to hang out with guys.... i like to hang out with girls too..esp my gang of friends..hmm.... but everything leave to FATE.... believe in fate now.... tired of chasing something....... something that seem so far..something that never meant to be mine.... friends who can last for life! not bf who can maybe laast for years only..or worst months!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

jUst d/l the song by JTL...'When did you heart stop loving me' .............. not bad not bad.... quite like it....

Im very worried for my tuition kid..haiz... that little boy will make me go INSANE......... hmm..... what should i do?!!?! any remedy?!?! his exma is coming..... *crY*

Today mother's day.... got Liverpool match.... wonder if EN will be busy...and wonder if i will get to see KEN,,jason and gang...is been a long long time since i last saw them at carteL..... i miss ken's smile... no he's not handsome...but just find him charming lor..wahahaha..i think he's in his twenties...my guess will be 24! or older... come on..he drives the 4 ring car..forgot the name.... then his friend the Jason is a citibank manager..so probably around 24-27 ba... pray hard they come today..if not I will be damm bored during work.... Hiro oso not working today..hAiz.....

*pJ started singing* " never gonna give you up...never gonna let you down...never gonna run around and desert u..... '

who is the person who i will never gonna give up?!!?!?!?!!? hmmm..... duNNo eh..

i miss my classmates le!!!!! my jie mei...my jie mei's gf..... my 'bf'...my bro^big..... xH...lina...and list just go on.................... must ask them go marina south eat steamboat! hee hee..tata dear bLog!!!!!!!!! going to have a hectic week next week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

timE: 4.10pm

Yeah....exams finally over...i think i started to get lazy!!!! didnt update my blog for 2 days..hahaha.....hmmm...too tired...yesterday was my last paper! Stupid OB paper... hAiz... ask me what is stress!!!! IM ALREADY UNDER STRESS....still ask me such questions!!! argh.

hmm..left the exam hall rather early cos i dunno what to write... haiZ..eng simply not my forte! or rather study is simply not my forte!!!! hmmm.... after paper went to meet mr james...omg..his jeep is FANTASTIC lor... very stable kind..so different with LANCER cars... hmm...but then he is so small siZe..haha...and drives me up the waLL...but alright la...did enjoy myself with him afterall.... had dinner at BK changi airport... haha..we are mad... or should i say he is mad...went mount faber too..haha...then east coast...then went changi village! haha...then accompany him to deliver his wine too... haha.and to marina south...wah..i think last night went round the entire singapore... ooOOoo........

my beloved niece is beside me.... yeah...is mother's day.... my sis bringing my mama to eat....without me... haiz..... going to work soon..have not iron my clothes..hAiz... i think i go off first...update tmL.... tata dear dear bLog.... and mR wiCked.... i hope his nose is back to norMAL................................................ hahaha...... basH his eyes next time! then he can become pAnda!! hohoho..........................

im madly in love with U...my dear dear blog!!!!!! guYs gUys gUYs only make woman sad la..........

tiMe.... 7.56pm

hmm...so fuLL.... just had dinner... hmm...suppose to be studying! why am i here?! hAiz..wanted to check out if the learning zone got anything for me to 'learn' for my OB paper tml..die... less than 20 hours to my next paper..anyway just visited my blOG..then saw WICKED left some COMMENTS.... argh! I WANT TO BASH***** him!!!!! i love my dear blog alot! of course i try to type as much as i can la...

Suppose to give tuition but she called say she want to cancel..haha..i was about to rush down from town..went to town to borrow booKs... haha.... borrow OB textbk and erm..story books to keep me company thru the BORING hols..hAiz.. HOW AM I GONNA SURVIVE?!?! hmmm...oh i went to check out the AMORE fitness as well...very keen to go learn kickboxing! gonna sign up the unlimited package..hahaha... then everydae go exercise! then my life wont be so bored! heee heee........

Last night worked at EN nearll made me vomit blood! that Noriko Drives me crazY! argh......cannot stand 'her'.... god ask 'her' be a guy she dont want...waste money to transform herself into a 'lady'...haiz... man avoid her like mad! haiZ...well, sould i pity her or what... as long as she likes it can already liaoz la... very busy!!!!!!!!!!!! i mean business over at EN..so many drunkards! all order beer..i think i served at least 40 gls of beer... damm it...hand ache! oh jason came to eat with his usual jap customer.!!! wonder they are couple not..hahaha..... *kPo*

came home then mr james called..hahaha....funny uncle..... anyway im not the kind who chats on the phone but i did chat with him over an hour or so??!!?!!? hahaha.... he's damm mature man! haiz.... gotta learn lots from him...and oso dying to see his JEEP..hahaha.....he so small size then drives a jeep..i simply cant figure it out.... i think i better go study....

nO jokeS in mY blOG coS im the jOker..hahahaha

pJ's quote! "To the world you may be one person, but to one person, you may be the world...."

hmmm.......my world..where are u??!?!?!

time: 1.05pm...

im STILL SICK...argh!! what the f***.....shit....going to waste money see doctor again...hAiz... hope they dont send me to tan tock seng! haiz..had a good sleep last night.. last night switched off my hp.... haiz..to prevent me frm SMSing in the middle of the night,.hahaha.... got a bad habit to keep on smsing! haiz...must keep my bill under 100 already... anyway just downloaded this song 'Lady hear me tonight Coz' my feeling is just so right....As we dance by the moonlight Can't you see you're my daylight ...' so nice.... kept huming this song... and downloaded this song byu modern talking.... cheri cheri lady... very nice too..hahahaha...

Hmm....my irc friend is online! Wicked is one funny friend man... i mean IRC friend..hahaha..can talk rubbish with him..... oh and fang min oso online..so happy... haha..im mad.... going to work soon... nah..still got 2 more hours to go...Today can see Kelvin!!!! hahaha..that handsome dude finally come to work...actually he is not handsome... but i find him CHARMING!!!!! very charming....got those charisma that will make me FAINT...hee hee..... oh.. then caveLL is working too..... hmm...hope tonight will be a FUN WORKING DAY.....

Oh.... clement msged me just now..haha..seldom got pple msg me in the morning..hahaha.... well, last night James sent me this mashimaro pic..so cute..hahaha... oh then asked him how old is he...... hahaa..... expected..25...yeah..im so good at guessing..hee hee... hmmm...... just now read y2m's blog..wonder why her hp line got terminated.... hmmm..... how to contact her....haiZ...well, wonder how can i survive without my hp... i think i will lost all my contacts...and well, i will never hear from THAT PARTICULAR GUY SINCE HE NEVER BOTHER TO TALK ON THE PHONE WITH ME AT ALL...argh....... how can he be so cruel to me...never even give me the chance to know him better ask a friend...ARGhhhh..i got no ill intentions....... serious la...i inspire to be NUn already................ hAiz.... dear dear blog... gTg...neeed to rest.... hAiZ *snEEzE* when will i be a luckY lady?! never i guess.....but can be a LUCKY SPINSTER OR NUn..wahahhahaha......

Time: 11.27pm

Still sick..today worst...took exam in ISOLATION ROOM..argh...no fever..jsut cough and fLu....need to wear mask to take exam! got difficulty in breathing!!!!!!!! hAiz... so lonely..but well, the place is cosy after all....listening to the same old song again.... 'Dont you want me baby, dont u want me oh....

hahaha....im simply in love with this song.... dunno why..... RETRO songs are just so me! hahaha.. about the exam todae.. hmm..didnt study much...lucky the paper was okay...... hope to get a C grade...hmm....last night was so shagged!!! slept all the way frm 7 still 10.30pm...argh...then called shereen for a short chat..ended up talking with her MAMA...hahahaha..so fuNNy... then.... i study till 1am....and fell asleeep....argh..something wrong with me..set my alarm clock at 7 but i woke up at 9am! IM HOPELESS.... hAiz...then i ate 2 spoons of porriage that my mama cooked then couldnt eat anymore... wanna vomit!! hAiz...cough like heLL...then went to sch meet lina...

hmm..my bf was the one who suggested to meet in the he came at 12.50...fantastic right!!! hAiz..lina was quite pissed off with him..hahahaha...... after exam i went straight to BBDC for driving lesson..... took bus to bukit batok then took cab...hAiz..cant afford to be late... today learn how to turn right and left..Haiz...always hit kerb..then the instructor so fuNNy..i think he is a jokEr!! hahaha... looking forward for my driving lessonsss in future...after driving i went to CCK meet sher for dinner..ate piZZa hUt...haha... but didnt finish my food.... haiZ..but im hungry... then on my way back home..i saw a dead body...behind my block... haiz..a old man.... i think he died in the hospital..then the ambulance brought him back for funeral purposes.. another funeral at my house estate...shucks... at least once every 2 weeks!! what is happening!!!!!!!!!

Today so many pple available on my icq list! ahahaha...so fun chatting with them.... great...and saying to Jeremy here...i know he is reading for sure! hahahaaha..hey pal... study hard for ur driving!!!!!

im so sleepy...lucky tml no paper..but working at EN frm 4-11...oh btw selene msged me..haiz...cartel might not want her anymore.... so sad.... i wonder if EN dont want me..what am i suppose to do?! i think i will go madamwong 2 and interview! hahahaha *drEaming* gonna read my magazine!!!!! wei xiao bao so nice!!! hahahhahaa..... *snEEze* *coUgh*

Time: 6.22pm...

Still SiCk! argh.... my blog also sick..yesterday evening tried to upload some stuffs...but cannot...hAiz... anyway im still sick..so cold...argh.... helP...today CIP exam cannot make it....my 3rd driving lesson also cannnot make it... dunno how to drive that damm car! argh..im seriously hopeless.... *COUGH* *SNEEZE* anyway last night was tossing around in bed...simply cant sleep though im very shagged.... i wonder why... hAiz...... i think need to visit the doctor again if this continues...tml got econs exam ..argh... heLp....

Hope to go harbour front soon...have not been there yet.... haha...... so many things to do..but i guess i go rest a while first... so cold.... tatat dear dear dear BLOG....... i miss MW2.... miss so many many pple.... btw saw fung fung todae! she asked me buy durian somemore! ahahah.... ciaoZzzzZzzzzz............ wo xiang ni!

Time: 10.35am!

SICK DAY....yeelian's birthdae as well.... happy birthdae to her..just sent her a sms via ICQ... argh..im sick...sick until i nearly landed in hospital... went to see doctor early in the morning yesterdae... then cancelled my 2 tuitions... hope that i rest well then at night can work at EN...cos is PAY DAY...desperately need the sum of money. Mum didnt understand why am i so stubborn...insist to work when im in such state..argh..mama, ur daughter got NO MORE MONEY... argh...of course i didnt tell her that..i spent my last 50 bucks on medical fees..and need to buy bus stamp... hAiz..pathetic... in the end i worked frm 6-9... haha.... hopeless....... oh jamEs msged me! hahaha.... fuNNy creepy gUy asked me out... maybe after my exams then go out with him... and DAvier asked me watch mid night movie with carl... FAINTED.... dont have strength to work..still bother to watch movie.... hmmm..... sher supposed to pick up her clothes..but well, she didnt in the end because she was with Tan ah pek...sher make up ur mind! u want tan ah pek or terence?! or u still have hope for TOMMY! hahaha UR MUM IS SO WORRIED...........................................

im hungry..but house got no food..and i doubt i can crawl out of the house to buy food.... and oso no $$$..cheque have not bank in yet...wallet left few cents..pathetic.... listening to the song Dont you want me....by Human LEague.. so nice...love the lyrics... *pJ stArted singing with no sound coming out...*

You were working as a waitress
in a cocktail bar
When i met you
I picked you out
I shook you up and turned you around
Turned you into something new

Now five years later
You've got the world at your feet
Success has been so easy for you
but don't forget it's me
Who put you where you are now
And i can put you back down too.

Don't, don't you want me
You know ' can't believe it
When i hear that you won't see me
Don't, don't you want me
You know i don't believe you
When you say that you don't need me

It's much too late to find
When you think you've changed your mind
You'd better change it back
Or we both will be sorry

Chorus:

Don't you want me baby
Don't you want me oh-oh
Don't you want me baby
Don't you want me oh-oh

I was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar
That much is true
But even then i knew i'd find a much better place
Either with or without you

The five years we have had
have been such good times
I still love you
But now i think it's time to live my life on my own
I guess it's just what i most do.

Don't you want me baby
Don't you want me oh-oh...

The day i leave for my overseas studies, i shall sing this song to the person i like most!!!!! hee...

Time: 6.03pm...

Listening to some chinese song title "Yi Liao Bai Liao"... very sleepy..today had my stats exam...haiz... cant make it...aiming to pass...my AD gone.... haiZ... how.... why am i so hopeless.... today is mian mian's birthdae..and this auntie here have not get her anything..how?! i think i need to make a trip to Forum and get the mini levis jeans..hee so nice... well..cost me $$$$ again..but nvm.... my favourite niece! hee...

LAst night the TV repair uncle came.... my tV went mad.... must be that china woman watched until it went mad! haiZ..somemore still try to act blur in front of me..what the heLL... hate pple like that... trying to act as if nothing happen... well, the uncle took away my beloved tV set... and cost $180 bucks in all.....SO EXPENSIVE..... mama suppose to give me $50 then i told her no need.... ask her use the money to go pay the repair fees..then she nagged at me..say wait i not enuff money... haiz..what can i do... i seriously got no more money... dont dare to buy soya bean milk in sch now...(although it costs 40cents only..) thought im getting my pay which might be around three hundred odd but still must pay for jap fees... hmm..now considering whether to take it or not... i wonder if next semester i have time not...hmmm.... HELP... need to talk to someone!!!!!

well, XMEN is out already..dying to watch... but hmm...with who? alone... argh.... have not get yeelian anything...dUnno buy what oso..maybe something from project shop... or mphosis....

ENVY = Jealously? haiZ..i think i envy alot of pple instead of jealous..... hAiz...... michelle just bought my dream phone 7250... argh..hAiz.... envy..NOT JEALOUS........... the horscope said that i will face financial crisis this month...hAiz..i think very true!!!!!!!!!! haha..... so many things to do during the hols..but first thing...exam! then i want to go learn kick boxing liAoz.....must vent anger! some man really qi si wo le!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and that man is .............................. shall not mention his name... see liAoz will faint!!!!!! haha..... im mad! time to watch news now..... quite concern with the SARS... haiZ............. tata my dear BLOG!!!!!

Time: 7.07pm...

Argh... my house tV is spoilt! and the repair man is not here yet!!!! oh my gosh..fainted..my mum waited till she fallen asleep.... tml is my stats paper! haiz... i think i know nothing even thought i went to study with Lina, Xh, Yanling and my 'bf' from morning 10.30am till about 7 plus... argh...im really hopeless!

Well, i went ZOuK last night..mambo night... ladies night... many pple night... hahaha..... well, shereen called bout 8 plus, i was at bras brasah mac donald trying to study my econs...freaking cold k... and i was like in shorts and t-shirt...though got tonnes of fats to protect me but still, hmm.... not a good place to study...but milliena walk BK is good man! Best Place sia! hee hee..... want to go there study next semster too..hee hee.... anyway was thinking whether to go ZOuk or not..cos i owned shereen something la...i dunno...then she's DYING TO GO...so no choice. i went to her hse and put on her clothes and there we go...landed in ZouK with a mystery man..hahaha.... super duper crowded...and alot of drunkards...but happening...althought got no place for me to shake! hee hee.... reached home at 3am sharp! the mystery man sent sher home and i went home myself...well, shereen is really a lucky lady! hee hee....... good good....

chatting with mr gongmando now... argh.... something is not right... but nvm.... woke up at 9am this morning! rushed to give tuition at 10! haiz...then came back and immediately went back to my dreamland and slept till 3plus..haha..... sleepy man...oh read the newspaper todae.... nokia 7250 is selling at 348 only..so tempted to rush down west mall and grab it..... but well, thinking for almost 2 whole hours... i decided not to..haha..i think i become more mature... hahaha..bull shit... anyway when i think i want to go pursue my studies overseas, i give up spending that 300 odd bucks.... that sum of money can pay for my transport fees overseas! hahaha..im thinking too much again! but no matter wat...must plan!

then i talked to my mama the other day regarding my overseas studies..she said no way she can afford... haiz...my mood went all the way down.... then, today i was eating watermelons then she said my dad and her came to a decision..i thought they want to separate.choy! they decided to sell the house one and a half year later...so that there will be a sum of money for me go overseas..haiz..im so happy! hmmm..wonderful parents..... im so lucky!

oh that day went to EN for japanese sake and food tasting, i nearly got drunk after drinking at least 6 kinds of different sake...sucks! yuCks....then our wine supplier was there oso.... then misaki grabbed my hand and pulled me outside and introduce them to me.... haha.... not them actually...is a guy..a skinny guy! named james...so funNy! hahaha..... anyway didnt bother much cos was busy eating! hee hee! well, listening to the songs from the CD PLATINUM 80s...nice nice...esp the song 'Turn back the Clock'

shall end here.... hols coming! pple....i want to date u out! hahahaha